“My neck! My back! … My neck and my back!” That was my cry for help 7 years ago when I first injured my back by hyper-extending it forward. I was imitating my physically fit and coordinated friend’s dismount from a gymnastic bar. She started by hanging by her legs and flipped so she landed on her feet. I did the same, except I landed on my head. The result was a back injury that plagued me for years. This past year or so I began to find the combination of treatments necessary to heal.
We have yet to fence our back yard. Each time we take the dogs out we risk they will run after a stray cat, bird, bunny or jogger. That is just what happened Sunday morning. I took off after Dooley and Gracie but slipped on the wet grass. When I hit the ground I heard a snap and a small static shock shot up my spine. The wind was knocked out of me. I staggered forward, fighting for air and searching for some canine ass to kick. After I recovered from the shock of the fall I realized it had agitated my old injury. I felt almost as bad as I did when I returned from the hospital all those years ago. I suspect the pain and limited range of motion stems mostly from inflamed muscles that should return to normal with the help of a few ice packs.
The chiropractor pointed out my blood pressure was a bit high as we sorted through my recent accident. High blood pressure? I’ve always had abnormally low blood pressure! It is so low there are times it causes me to pass out without warning. How could I have high blood pressure? I went to seek solace from Catherine who ran the Arby’s drive-thru. Then I sought counsel from Kevin over at Hardee’s. Deborah at Chipoptle comforted me with a little extra sour cream and cheese on my steak burrito. They all agreed that the only factor that had changed since the reports of my low blood pressure was my new family. I expected the kids would one day be the death of me. I just did not expect it would happen so soon.
But Marriage isn’t all clogged arteries and broken spines. There are family meals. When I was younger I never fully understood the value of a family meal. We returned from Mexico to find the interior of our house covered in a sea of brown boxes that contained the contents of Elise’s previous home. This made kitchen meals difficult, but to my delight the grill got a little extra culinary love. Preparing meals is now such a treat. No longer am I limited to either cooking impossibly small portions or eating the same meal all week long. Best of all, I had 3 dinner companions in place of my TV and computer. They even helped clear the table! The price: the children are only interested in eating the tastiest food in the house. Before a pack of Oreos or a gallon of ice cream would last a month. Now they disappear before the fourth day. If I am ever to taste anything sweet again I am going to need to create a stash–complete with secret map and booby traps. (Yar!)