Farewell to Azeroth
The whole Sheppard clan have pitched in to help trim the family budget. Noah volunteered to take public swimming lessons in lieu of private lessons. Madison decided to spend most of her time at her new BFF’s home. Elise agreed to purchase her entire 2007 office wardrobe at the local Goodwill store. What could I do to contribute? It occurred to me I had not played World of Warcraft since April. I decided buy a one-way griffin ride from Stormwind to the real world.
But what will happen to the characters I’ve helped grow these past years? Phifer has taken an extended sabbatical at the Northshire Abbey. She leads Sunday School, participates in choir and recently joined the abbey’s weekly wine tasting club. Cinch has become Iron Forge’s leading alarm expert in Iron Forge. When she finds the time, she likes to get away to Booty Bay where she ganks low level horde. Awaka spends most of her time hiking in Nagrand, communing with nature and whatnot. Vlock is still being corpse camped by a Gnome rogue, deep in Stranglethorn. Jerk.
Don’t Stand so Close to Me…
Children are dirty. Their noses ooze. Their hands are sticky. Schools are part-time quarantines. It’s like the Wall Street of the microscopic world. Parents toss their kids into a colony of contagions to see what new disease the child can bring home. Being a teacher is like being an activities coordinator at a leper colony, only lepers are usually considerate enough to ring a bell when they are near. Children swarm in for group hugs. Is it any wonder teachers have taken upon themselves to develop solutions to the air-born illnesses? I would like to contribute to my own idea: school uniforms. Every warm body must jump in a hazmat suite (decorated in school colors) before boarding the school bus. In the mean time, MIT has created some phenomenal paint for public facilities.
09.23.03Shirtless O’Clock
As you may already know, we aren’t fond of solicitors here at Unicoi Systems. Hey, but when hands give you lemons, make lemonade. Likewise, when solicitors accost you never take them seriously. Last weekend the guys agreed that I should greet the next unwanted solicitor bare chested. If you don’t follow the rational I suggest you read this first.
I was just about to leave for lunch when I heard the a hapless solicitor meekly call out “hello?” from the foyer. I ripped my shirt over my head and headed towards the door. I greeted the man and he introduced himself as the Mayor Henry Ford Gravitt. Oh cwap.
Scott was unaware of our little prank. Imagine his surprise when Greg (for apparently no reason at all) jumped up and threw his shirt over his head. I saw him peer out from Scott’s office to help show the man to the door. I also saw the sudden shock when he realized this was the mayor of Cumming come to check our business license. Greg dashed back behind the door and I heard Scott laugh as Greg frantically fought to pull his shirt back over his head so he could properly greet our special guest.
Me? My face was a bit flush. I thought it best to leave rather than try to explain myself. I figured Greg could answer any questions the Mayor might have about the nature of the business we run here.
08.21.03Eyebrow Envy
Girls tell me he’s hot. Critics tell me he’s expressive. All I see are two huge bushy things dancing on the guy’s forehead. I’m talking about Colin Farrell. At first I did not know what to make of Colin. S.W.A.T. emphasized action over acting and I although Phone Booth looked interesting I never got around to seeing it. Imagine my surprise when I found Collin staring back at me during the opening scenes of Hart’s War. Little did I know that although Bruce Willis dominates the DVD cover Colin plays a leading role with more lines and camera time. Curious, I began looking for other films with Colin in them. I found he has been in only a few films, among them is Minority Report. I think I’ll keep an eye on this guy.
Ah, but I’ve seen the times and they are a changin’. Just like the time when men decided they liked ghetto booty..er..I mean curvy women, now women seem to have taken to big brows. So here I lie in bed with my forehead smothered in Rogaine (not the sort that breed zombie zygotes; that’s Rograin).
Also, I took note that no one took a minute to let Amazon know how helpful my review of the ARM reference manual is. (Two puns…) All you gotta do is scroll down and press a button! Philistines!